Learning from Song of Solomon #2

Girl:

⁵ Dark am I, yet lovely, O daughters of Jerusalem, dark like the tents of Kedar, like the tent curtains of Solomon.
⁶ Do not stare at me because I am dark, because I am darkened by the sun. My mother’s sons were angry with me and made me take care of the vineyards; my own vineyard I have neglected.
[Song of Solomon 1:5-6, NIV]

Women are always very conscientious about their looks. Even the girl knows that herself is lovely (in reality she was beautiful enough as the love of King Solomon,) she is more focus about the inadequacy of her skin tone. David A. Hubbard said that, “Her song of self-description points to her modesty at best – ‘who am I to deserve such an attractive and admirable man?’ - and her self-deprecation at worst – ‘I am so unworthy of him that I don’t want you, my Jerusalemite friends, to remind me of it.’” Whatever the case, she concerns about her look.

The reason that she didn’t look good was that she was a working girl (her brothers made her caretaker of the vineyard), and so she have neglected herself. There’s a lesson here to learn. This girl is not just out caring for physical self, but she is willing to submit to her family’s authority. She works hard as well. What a woman.

Application: Strengthen your mate’s beauty. A psychiatrist pastor friend of mine suggested:

First, look at your wife’s beauty. Get her beauty clearly in your mind—let it become the primary visual effect she has on you.

Second, find a way to convince her of her beauty; do this at least a couple of times each day. Sincerity is important (refer to the first bit of advice). It is important that you mean what you say and it is even more important that she be convinced that you mean it. (This morning I mentioned my wife’s ability to select clothes that compliment her beauty as she dressed for work….)

Third, at some point your appreciation of her beauty and her joyful response to your love will allow the reintegration of the rib to its proper place near your heart (Gen. 2:21 and related verses).

I still having problem complimenting my wife on her beauty more. Someone had suggested that I would write to her.

O God, help me to affirm my love one of her beauty more.